Italy Vacation
Vacationary progress via Italia
It started with the bus ride from Dartmouth NH to Boston. It was a sunny day and enjoyable ride. No stress with traffic and I gave myself plenty of time to get to the airport.
Once I got to the airport I went through the process and got to my gate with plenty of time to spare. The flight was on time and I was on my flight to Amsterdam. Once I boarded I noticed I had an isle seat. Then a young German lady said she was sitting next to me. She was polite and soft spoken. She started rambling off about being a vegan and pointing at an island near Iceland that was known for whaling and was telling me about it in a puddle horror movie voice which I thought was ironic because this chick was evolving into the Gretta Thumburger type. I just played it cool and gave her a hypothetical senario about how your imagining how it must be interesting to be from a family from that island and it's a generational practice and someone decided to buck the system. Honestly. Woke Hollywood should be all over that.
By this time we were in the air and I didn't feel like I couldn't catch my breath like I had on previous flights. I took a moment to relish that. It was a nice oh me moment. Meanwhile she was still processing what I just said. The flight attendant decided to pop over and check in. It must have been her facial expression but I wasn't paying to much attention to that. She was very polite and said things were fine. I asked her how her father felt about her being vegan. She said he was as well. I think she was lying. But you that's fine. You'll get that 🤷♂️
So we settled into the six hour flight and made good on our time. When we landed I wished her well and got to customs and it was a long line. The customs officer was giving some people a hard time. But I didn't have much of a problem.
I was happy to be at my gate with an hour to spare. The Amsterdam airport is pretty amazing. They have a good touch of style. The people are very polite and a bit dull at a glance. Everyone I experienced from the Netherlands kinda acted as if they have never experienced an orgasm in their life. I could tell that my next vacation should probably be over this way for the Cuisine and interior design 🤷♂️
Once on the plan for Florence I was starting to feel the lack of sleep a bit. But I was to amped up to sleep with excitement. The thought of them losing my bags did keep me grounded. But I did have a plan for that with my carry on bag.
We got to Florence and it was awesome to see the landscapes of the tuscany region on the plan before landing. Living in the countryside in Italy certainly does seem like a slice of heaven.
When we landed I had a bit of a walk to baggage. I was a little concerned. I thought they lost my bags but I found them a little after the fact compared to the rest.
When I got my shit together I boarded the local train. That was interesting. I felt like I was flirting with disaster but trying to take in Italy. I got off and on and had no idea of the layout of the city. I dealt with a young girl looking at my bags like I was fresh meat. I had my personal information all broken up and a work out fanny pack because TikTok videos got me a little sketched out because of pick pockets. When we made stops she was looking at a chance to grab my stuff and run before the door shuts. Young girls do this because they know your not supposed to punch them in the mouth.
I was definitely running on fumes at this point. I finally said fuck it and grabbed a taxi. I got to the hotel and checked in. It was a cool vibe at first. The lady was very friendly. When I got to my room I realized my bed is a twin. That kinda sucks when your 6’5 but I didn't bitch about it. I looked online and found out all the rooms are like that. At this point I was on thirty hours of no sleep. It was 6pm and of course I wanted to crash but I decided to go walk around. I started to realize Florence was amazing. Near the trainline it was a little dumpy. I started to feel sensory overload kick in. I'm not used to this many options and then you take a street and get smacked in the face with eye candy Cuisine and designs. It was a lot. I was hungry but couldn't make a decision. Meanwhile I have no wifi. I felt like I was raw dogging it and then I'm in the leather district. I wanted to look at stuff. But the Solicitation was over the top and plus I was hungry. My grandpa always taught me to never impulse buy and I plowed along. I found a place that served the famous Tuscan sandwich eat it up. The Italian boys who were working were nice but they love bombing some chick who I assume was foreign. It was a little tacky but the sandwich was good and I was on my way. I made my way back to the hotel and put in 26k steps for the day and shattered any previous record. I looked up the restaurant that I eat at. They had a 1.5 star rating. I was like wtf. But also said if that's how far the they set the bar around here I'm optimistic of the days to come. It was was pretty good as far as I'm concerned.
At the hotel before calling it a night. I reached out to a Vermonter who helped me at my restaurant. Eddy is a mechanic in the air force and is stationed an hour in a half from Venice. Before dozing off we finalized some details about meeting up. After that I settled in and called it a night. When I woke up I was full of energy but the time difference was doing some mind fuckery to me.
I started walking to the train station. I scoped it out the night before and I ended up a little all over the place but I entered through the back of the station and the guard was nice enough to let me on by.
When I got to the counter I was at the mercy of the train schedule. It worked our well. I only had to wait an hour for the next train. So I decided to grab a Cappuccino and came to grips with the fact that if you just want a cup of coffee. We'll. Your pretty much out of luck. So I waited twenty minutes for a double cap and six people were in front of me. A kid who had a blank expression and the patience of a saint was cranking out food and drinks like a champ. Not flustered but no wasted movements. It was the most professional version of “you can't get weeded if you don't give a crap”.
By the time I sucked that down and did some people watching I was ready to stare at the departures up on the big screen. I then noticed my train was ready to board. It was exciting. I'd never been on a high speed train before 🚅 As soon as I settled in I connected to the wifi and reached out to Eddy to let him know what time I'd be arriving at the station. We figured out a meeting place. He said we should meet at the Hard Rock Cafe. I figured that would be easy enough. I walked out into Venice and was certainly taken back by it all. I began to realize how big and narrow it was. I certainly didn't expect a good amount of that. At first I felt like I had some time to take it all in.
About ten minutes into the walk I was realizing that The Hard Rock Cafe was going to be a bitch to find. So I found a couple people who I thought would be okay to ask. There directions were shit. But it isn't the easiest place to navigate around. So I kinda felt a sense of urgency to find this place before Eddy did. Meanwhile I'm still trying to take this place in while being in selfie mode.
All of a sudden I end up in the square and it opened right up. I found a little jewelry store and saw a young lady working. With the jet lag I decided to be polite and point blank by saying ‘wow! This is beautiful. The square that is.. I'm trying to find the Hard Rock Cafe. You know. Probably the most American establishment floating around on this mass. I understand if you can't be bothered but I'd appreciate the help. She smiled and pointed me in the right direction. It was pretty close by. That was a relief.
At the Cafe I posted up and ordered a mia Tia. Then I texted Eddy and told him arrived. I decided to leave out the part where we probably should have met at the train station and I can't believe that Im spending money at The Hard Rock Cafe in Venice while in Venice.
Before I knew it Eddy came through the door with his family and had his son strapped on his backpack. I paid the tab and wanted to get back out and about. We only had a few hours at this point.
We started walking and his daughter was just about over all of that. I honestly can't blame the kid. We had a good talk about what we were up to. He has done really good for himself in the air force. He has been able to travel and has seen some cool stuff. I did mention that it's probably not to often that a couple of NEK boys are floating around this area.
At this point it was late afternoon and I hadn't eaten. So sensory overload started kicking in again like it did in Florence the day before. The kids were also getting hungry. We decided to go with a Cafe near the square. I had lasagna bolagnaise & pizza. I knew with the timing that could be my one meal of the day. It was really good but not the best I've ever had. I was glad to see the kids were happy with what they got. The seaguls were also very happy and attacking our table because a little bread fell on the ground. The server would come over with a bottle and spray them every once in a while. They'd fly away and come right back over when he walked away. But anyways.. The pizza oven wasn't hot enough. But Venice isn't known for that. But someone a canal or two over is probably nailing it.
Before we left I used the bathroom and being a typical American I realized that this situation isn't ideal for a catastrophic number 2. So I took a moment to be grateful and realized this should be factored in. I'll put it this way. They definitely didn't have a toilet paper crisis during covid.
So then we hit the streets with a full belly. I was paying attention to the time. We were certainly short on it and missing the last train would have been a bad situation. We did pop into some shops and the Solicitation was still over the top like Florence. I really did want to do one of those famous gondola rides. But with the timing I determined that someday hopefully soon I have to come back to Venice to get the total experience.
We ended up grabbing a ferry to be able to be on the water. We were cramed in there like sardines. It wasn't memorable but it got us closer to the train station. Once we unloaded we back tracked a little. I bought a purse for my girlfriend where Eddy bought a purse for his wife. I decided to get it in the sea of options and lean on her better judgment.
After that we parted ways. My train was arriving a little before there's. At this point I just waited and game planned the days to come.
On the way back to Florence I managed to snag a better seat and see the landscapes. I did have wifi anf looked at some stuff. But I was selective with all of that.
When I got back to Florence I started walking back to the hotel anf got off track. I found this sister location on where I was staying and it definitely had a better vibe. I finally got frustrated a wee bit and tapped out at 25k steps and grabbed a taxi.
When I got back to the hotel I was a little hungry but everything was surprisingly closed. It was 10:30pm my time 🇺🇸
So I settled in and was ready to catch up on some sleep. But I needed to utilize that buffet and be up and at em before they shut it down in the AM. So I texted photos to my girlfriend and went to bed with the thought that I better stay put because nothing good happens after 10pm 🤷♂️
I guess in Italy I'm a morning person as I jump out of bed.
I grabbed brunch at the place I was staying. It was an impressive buffet. It was similar to an American breakfast but they optional twists that made it stand out above and beyond. Little egg custard, chia parfaits in mini mason jars. I'd never seen perfecto sliced charcuterie as a breakfast option but it certainly works well. I didn't want to over indulge on breakfast because I knew I wanted to save room for later. As a Chef I don't typically eat more than twice a day. It was certainly nice to sit down and relax and eat.
With a full belly I headed to the train station and asked about hop on hop off tours in Florence. I really wanted to get a more spread out view of Florence and hit some areas I knew would be hard to get to by foot. I was a little bummed to see that the bus stopped running after 5pm. I talked with the lady who was the tour guide to get a feel of the best stops. I decided to get off on the famous ridge that overlooks Florence. That was a good call. I took a lot of photos walked around and bought a sweater seeing how I wasn't dressed properly. It matched the iconic light brown tuscany architecture that you see off in the distance and particularly in the countryside. I also got a hat. I didn't wear that because I already felt enough like a tourist due to the crisp air and light drizzle.
I went to a small church and looked around. It was on a hiking path near some buji hotel. I said a prayer and then went to the hotel and grabbed a late lunch. The patio was open and it seemed like a bit of a shit show. Probably a bunch of new hires. The server laughed and I think he was like oh just another dumb American who's gonna be a pain to deal with. I order an aperal spritz and charcuterie board and kicked back for a few. It was good. It was hard to mess up so I rolled with it.
After lunch I boarded the final bus to get down to the bottom of the ridge. I saw a sign for an affordable entry to some gardens and went for it. I went in with the idea that this should be pretty quick. It was huge. I had to do a steep incline and was thankful for my new sneakers. Im glad I rolled with comfortability over fashion. Looking around I saw some other people that were not to lucky as far as that goes. The Gardens were pretty amazing. I could tell a lot of people were exhausted from walking but trying to take it all in.
After all that I ended up back on the streets. Getting towards the city center I enjoyed seeing where the locals stayed away from the hustle and bustle. I peered into some restaurants because Id imagine this is where the good stuff is. At the time I wasn't to hungry. Before I knew it I was at the historic bridge. I relaxed and watched some street performers pick at the guitar. The vibe was good. I definitely felt grateful that the forecast continued to hold off. Once that was all taken in I explored the streets that were around the city center a little more. I made note of not going towards the same path as I did on the first day. When I built up an appetite I ended up grabbing a pastry and Gelato. That was amazing but definitely curbed my appetite. I felt the need to get back towards the hotel. I was definitely exhausted. Once I made that decision I knew it was a long walk but I had a better idea of the general direction seeing how I wasn't relying on my phone.
Once I got towards the hotel I noticed that all the restaurants were closed. Pretty much everything was closed. Being a food oriented vacation I could have gotten a little bent out of shape with that but I just called it a night and went back to the hotel and shut it down.
On day four of my trip I was up and at em at 6am. I walked to the train station booked a ticket to Rome. In the previous days I arranged a tour of the Vatican and the Collesium. I did have a little anxiety about making it to my tour on time at the Vatican. The train ride was pretty cool. The landscapes were good on the eyes. Even though they were barely open.
I got to Rome and the train station was what one would expect. I mean it is Rome. The shops were pretty cool but I had no time for that and needed to get a cab. This time crunch was crucial. I found a cab easily. The traffic was pretty insane but that's to be expected on a Saturday before Easter in Rome. It was definitely the most scenic taxi ride I have been on. The taxi driver was polite for an Italian guy. Once I saw that I was going to be on time for my tour a sense of relief kicked in. The cab driver pointed me in the right direction. I checked in with my tour and had twenty minutes to spare. I went and used the restroom and thought about a Cappuccino but I knew the timing wouldn't work out with all that seeing how I was on there time. I wasn't gonna let there laid back approach on life compromise my once in a lifetime experience.
When I meet the group of people for my tour of the Vatican it was a friendly religious bunch of people. The tour guide was truly unique. She was a very charming Italian lady with a thick long drawn out Italian accent. She had a lot of body language and was the optimy of charismatic. It made me wonder if women were like this back during the empire. Probably not.. But it was a cute idea. She definitely put off the vibes as a trophy wife doing her part. The line to the Vatican was very long. I was thinking about how long is this going to take. Then the Vatican opened and that started to get it moving pretty good. Imaginary that one 🤷♂️
We got to the customs aspect of the Vatican and that went smoothly. We headed to the exhibit aspect and up the stairs. Taking a lot of pictures was on everybody's mind. How a lot of these artifacts have held up over time is pretty impressive. The Roman artifacts were made of Granite. That is gonna last forever. Some of the artifacts that were from other cultures were pretty primitive. About ten minutes into the tour I noticed everyone had Christmas in their eyes. Im way to cynical for all that. I was starting to ask myself questions about the core ethics on how these items were obtained. Meanwhile we hadn't even gotten to Saint Peter's square. I will say that I felt like I was on a tour of a consolidation process of the Roman Empire.
When we got to Saint Peter's Square the phones were coming out quickly. As the tour guide was telling the group that we will have plenty of time to take pictures some stereotypical southern dixiecrate Americans interrupted the guild and told her to take there picture. I surprisingly was the only one who rolled my eyes and mumbled a sigh. The tour guide handled it with class and made an exception. But my guess is she wouldn't have if the possibility of a race card being pulled out wasn't in the back of her mind. That was a good time for me to work my way to the back of the group and remind myself I'm not that kind of American 🤷♂️
Other than the classic photo in front of the church there wasn't to much. They did have a modern art piece of earth which probably has more of a cryptic design than the tour guide was letting on. There was also a giant pine cone monument that signified fertility.
After a brief run down of that we went to an area that had historical time frames of the 16th chapel. It was fascinating to hear about the rivalry between Michelangelo and Rafeal. To hear about the in depth process of it all was pretty intense. Watching those two operate at that time and space must have been interesting. My guess is people took it for granted. But everyone enjoys being entertained by a good rivalry. That's when the tour guide ended the tour and we were on our own.
Before we entered the 16th Chapel the security amped up. It was pretty evident on how much dead weight they had on the payroll. I wondered who your daddy had to be to land that cush job. Basically lots of grandstanding. No cameras in the chapel seemed to make a lot of sense when gatekeeping tends to be your go to move. It's all about preservation. A camera flash is bad for biz.
The 16th chapel was crowded. It was a lot to take in. The attention to detail was amazing. Having a chair would have been a good way to appreciate the details. Looking around I saw a lot of people walking around like they crossed that one off the list. It was remarkable. It was crowded but lived up to the hype.
After that there were more exhibits and I wasn't as camera happy with my phone. Before leaving the Vatican I did see the tour guide and gave her a cash tip and told her that Rome never fell. It became a church. Her facial expression was priceless. As stoic as possible I then left the Vatican and said to myself they need to pay more respect the JC.
I was relieved that was over. But it was entertaining. I then grabbed a cab and felt a sense of urgency to get to the Collesium. I got to take in more views from a different angle and started realizing I wish I had more time.
When I got to the Collesium it was one of those moments when your taken back by all the history. I found my tour and was a little early. I was relieved and then they asked me to step aside and brought me to an office. They told me my vice president was visiting and acted all bug eyed. I said that's cool. Then the fella told me that my tour had been canceled. I looked over to the group I was checking in with and thought to myself. Well.. It doesn't look like it's canceled to me. I quickly took in the perspective that it is probably ideal to not be stuck with this tour and to be relegated to just seeing the inner aspects of the Collesium. It worked out. They canceled my tour anf refunded me the money.
At that point I was hungry and decided to grab lunch at a cafe with really good pizza slices ready to go. I added a Caesar Salad because that certainly makes sense in Rome. The salad was mid and the pizza was solid. The server was a nice guy from India. He loved the fact that from the US. I certainly hadn't experienced to much of that on this trip.
When I hit the streets in Rome I back tracked to the spots. Close to the Collesium to take in the history. Off course I took a few laps around that general area. The sheer size of it all was crazy. I defined barely scratched the surface. I only had a couple hours to weave in and out of some streets. With no cell phone service I had to be conscious that I wasn't putting myself to far from being in an area to flag down a taxi.
When the time came to get a taxi I found a guy who may not have been very reputable. His car was a piece of shit. He was an asshole. His opening line was I don't speak English with a lot of attitude. I said bus station and he got me there relatively quick. I was ready to punch him if he tried any shady stuff. His vibes were aggressive and interesting. Before getting out I gave him a dollar tip and told him to get fucked. Certainly not someone you'd want to pay with a card..
When at the bus station I checked out the malls and the shops and grabbed a Cappuccino. I'm glad the timing worked out in order to do that.
On the train I was back online and looking at some options. I booked a wine tour and caught up with some social media and kept the GF in on what I'd been up to.
When we got back to Florence I walked back to the hotel and regrouped. After a brief time relaxing I decided I needed to go find a place to Chow because everything was gonna close. I met a Chinese couple from Germany and they were looking to do the same. They had internet and I asked if I could follow them. They were nice. So I did that. We found a place called Mateo and it seemed symbolic. So I thought that was a great find. But I'm sure the sea of options being closed helped narrow that one down. I had an appetizer of aged beef, rosemary wrapped in fat and served with arugula. I liked it. But it definitely wouldn't fly with the customers I'm used to serving. I also finished it off with a pizza which was good but a little floppy.
I worked my way back to the hotel and called it a night. I had to be up early once again. With the time change it didn't effect me to much surprisingly. I've always thought the early bird gets the worm but worms are gross.
In the morning of Easter Sunday I got going and passed the buffet that I was paying for and not utilizing because I've been busy trying to get out the door in the AM.
When I checked in with my tour I didn't realize it was a twelve hour excursion. My thought was well.. I should get my money's worth. It was certainly a good deal. The tour guide was Sicilian. He had a great accent and a very positive outlook on life with a touch of narrsasism which I can respect 🤷♂️
For the first leg of the journey we headed to a winery for lunch. It was an interesting group. The Americans seemed to stick together which was unfortunate. There was a couple that was from Florida and a couple from California. Both were annoying and had a teenage child. Throw in a Chinese father anf daughter from Virginia it definitely made for some good people watching. The California couple really enjoyed telling people they were from San Francisco like it was a badge of honor. The husband was an entitled IT douche nozzle and his wife certainly seemed like she hadn't worked a day in her life. The son would just go off the handle over stupid shit. It was five stupid white people problems. This kid is definitely going to be a frat boy. He was trying to flirt with the Chinese American college student who looked twelve it was entertaining to watch but also annoying 🤷♂️
When we got to the winery I had to sit next to this family and the family from Florida. I wasn't excited to see how that would unfold. The guy from Florida must have come from old money. Very awkward guy. Cowboy hat, mouth breather, bug eyed and loved to stay stupid shit with his mouth open and lick his lips. His wife looked like her name was Karen and she thought it was a good idea to pour water in her wine because she thought it was to strong. Then went off on a tangent about how rude Italian people are. I just asked her if turning wine into water was working out well for her and thought briefly about bringing up politics 🤷♂️ I will say that I was impressed that no one decided to take it there. I will say the young girl from Florida was very smart.
The food was pretty basic. It was served family style and paired with wine. The cheese and charcuterie were great. The salad was fresh. Wild boar, pasta was also very good. From a numbers standpoint it seemed like they have a good deal with the touring company. I'd assume it helps keep them a float. When I was leaving I made sure to grab some biscotti, pasta and information for my portfolio. It was a cool experience. The vineyard was very impressive. We loaded onto the bus and I had a nice buzz. I typically don't drink but the occasion seemed right.
We then headed to Sienna. We could see it off in the distance from the vineyard. It was a nice drive with narrow roads. When we arrived I was excited. The history was cool. The tour guide was telling us about how mid evil the town is. They also hate Florence which was fascinating.
When we unloaded in Sienna we went as a group to do the tour and meet up with a local tour guide. We're taking in the architecture and before we knew it an old Italian lady was talking to us. The other tour guide was putting off the vibes of oh shit here we go again.. This lady was very direct. The group couldn't really handle it. Especially the Americans. I loved it. I was the only one smiling. She quickly reaffirmed fuck Florence. I know that's where your coming from but we don't like them. She gave the history lesson of why. She walked very slowly and used a lot of hand gestures. I found it amusing when she was telling the people from California that covid started in 2019 and not 2020. The people from California tried to stand there ground but she just interrupted them and told them to look it up on YouTube. It was incredibly vain and comical. I certainly appreciated the horror on the faces. It was almost like this lady was arguing with herself. People weren't saying to much. When in the hospital slash art gallery which was crazy.. She told us they used to stack the bones in here like lasagna. The thick accent really made that warm my heart. She also was saying if you lived to 30 you were lucky. The old hospital that is now a museum was definitely cool. The art really told a story. She said the hospital closed in 1997. When we concluded our trip with her she suggested if we want to tour thr basement it's very interesting but we might not come back. This lady must have had a brilliant dark sense of humor. She then started to ramble on about how we should all come back and visit and not go to Florence. I almost asked this lady for her autograph 🤷♂️
We then touched base with the original tour guide anf he gave us a time frame to meet back at the bus. He kinda looked like he was in shock by seeing that stand up routine. I started walking down streets set my timer and was on the look out for shops. I grabbed some of there famous pound cake. It was one of the coolest towns Ive seen. That had a very rebellious nature about them. The city was in a fortress. The side streets anf living situations were fascinating. The city center was spectacular. Every year they have horse races through the square. I'd definitely like to check it out. It was also interesting to learn that the square was built to create an attraction and get rid off a public health issue. Basically the sewage used to run down a slope into a pool. When basic plumbing got figured out they made it into one of main attractions in Italy. That's one way to roll with the punches and come out on top. When our time was coming to an end the punch drunk guy from Florida got lost in the sauce and held the group up. The tour guide wasn't to impressed.
When we loaded up on the bus we had a little drive to San Gimignano. We got to hear more about the history from the tour guide. He was definitely very good at his job. People still had a pretty good buzz going from the vineyard.
When we arrived to San Gimignano we were informed to try the Gelato and the the saffron. I told the guide that this was the stop where the wheels fall off and I don't have a lot of faith in this group.
I made sure to get some of that. They had some really nice shops and I grabbed the GF a bracelet that really stood out to me. She does love that bracelet. The town definitely had an Easter feel to it. A guy was dressed in robe that was all red was preaching in Italian very dramatically. My guess was that he was telling everyone there going to hell. The architecture was also brilliant and it had that fortress vibe. It had some similarities to Sienna. Basically back to back destinations where I wished I had more time. I found the saffron and eat the gold medal winning Gelato. I'd definitely come back on a romantic trip.
When I headed back to the bus I was a little concerned about making it on time. I saw a young lady who looked like my GF who was a part of my group. I said to her you seem like you know where your going and we're running out of time. She sure did. We made it in time. She tried chatting more with me but I needed to get away. She looked to much like my GF and maybe god was testing me. I kinda felt bad for her. She was sitting with an Asian American from NYC who was putting the full court press on her and trying to get his picture taken with her earlier in the day at the vineyard. She had to go back to all that and sit next to him.
So we are sitting on the bus and it's past our time on when we should be heading out. Outside in front of the bus is a lady from the group who is from India who is vomiting and is black out drunk. The tour guide was flustered because we were getting behind schedule. Her husband who is a doctor was also tipsy. So I immediately started thinking about my semi psychic capabilities. I realized it was to early to make a jab at the tour guide about that but it was only a matter of time with this group. Surprisingly team U.S.A didn't shit the bed. That was who I was thinking was going to drop the ball.
So we finally get on the road. The tour guide is pissed. He basically gives us a politically correct pep talk but also finds a diplomatic way to stand his ground. Then in a semi private way he tells the doctor he should find another way to get back to Florence. So we are heading to go see Pisa and that was tough to watch for whatever reason.
When we get to Pisa I had a feeling this is going to be probably the lamest part of the trip. It was also the the last stop before the long drive back to Florence. When we got to Pisa it was raining pretty good. I was immediately grateful that the rain had held off all day. We were immediately bombarded by African immigrants trying to sell us rain coats. I told the tour guide is there some kind of racket here as far as that stuff goes? When it's nice out do they push gizmos. Who's the king pin of this operation? Then I saw an African guy with an addidas track suit and pointed that out to him and said that answers my question. That seemed like the perfect timing to mention my prediction in San Gimignano. It was almost like he was waiting for it. I told you this group would only disappoint seemed direct enough. So I rolled with that. I'm not saying I've got some Nostradomus effect going on but was I right or was I right? Yes or yes? He nervously laughed and gave me a soft jab and decided to insert his dominance and warn the group that there are pit pocketers and there young women and he wasn't afraid to wrap them up into a pretzel because he knows jujutsu.. Interesting power move. But unique none the less. Authenticity always prevails. I was impressed. He's definitely earning his tip that he doesn't know about.
We only had a short time in Pisa. I checked out a church for Easter mass and then figured out an interesting selfie with the leaning tower. Seeing how the tour guide specializes in pep talks I decided to give him one and say how it's impressive that they can take a fuck up and make it a tourist destination. Over time they spent a lot of money to preserve that fuck up. That's dedication. So they've got that going for them which is nice.. 🤷♂️
So I got my selfie. It wasn't cliche and I'm happy about that. As far as Pisa goes it's kind of got a Gypsy Carni vibe and a shit hole compared to the other spots which are hard to top 🤷♂️ I wouldn't go back. Got my selfie ✔️
So once we were on the bus I could see the sense of relief with the tour guide. No major catastrophic things to report when rolling back into Florence. But the lady that was puking was still out like a light and her drunk distinguished husband was like a deer in the headlights. The tour guy loosened up on the fact that it is what it is. The ride was nice. It certainly was a long day. Most of us hated eachother by the end of it. Basically a twelve hour road trip with strangers I wouldn't care to talk to for more than five minutes.
When we rolled into Florence I found my way to the nicest spot near the train station for the famous dry aged Tuscan steak for my Easter dinner splurge. I definitely went off budget and spent some money on that. I added beans and some truffle cream of potatoes. It was amazing the half assed server was definitely surprised on how much I eat and how quickly I put that one down the hatch. The bartender or owner was very friendly and gave me a shot of lemon cello and glanced at the pants and I headed back to the hotel to get rested up for another early morning.
I made sure to be the first at the breakfast buffet once again on my final day in Italy. They still had the same layout from the previous time. When enjoying my food I glanced at my phone and got a notification that the Pope died. I immediately thought thats pretty ironic. I could have fun with my little circle of Vermonters with cooking up some fake news stories when I get back. I must say the follow up on that has been pretty entertaining.
So I hit the streets of Florence and strolled around. My objective was to have a very good understanding of it before leaving. I had been keeping mental catalog on stuff and bought a lot of gifts for people at a good price. I was brought up not to impulse buy and it certainly paid off. I figured I would sit down at a cafe and enjoy some wine and bruscetta. I did some people watching and watched a server bring toxic to another server. I definitely wanted to bitch slap the instigator. Overall the service in Italy was garbage. That just confirmed it. Maybe without tips from the majority of the customers it doesn't create much of an incentive to be a decent person. At this point I wasn't generalizing. It was pretty common. They didn't ever get overwhelmed because they don't give a shit. To cool for the weeds. The tourism is always gonna be there must be where there heads are at.
So I meet up with my Foodie Tour right outside the Cafe. I saw my tour guide and had my information all ready to go. She was quick to say that I wasn't on the tour. I patiently told her she needed to look into that. Sure enough my information showed up when I had her make a phone call.
When the tour began she gave a comical introduction. It was even better when she wasn't trying to be funny. She had a thick accent and put off a fire cracker vibe. I immediately started feeling bad for whoever her future husband may be.
She concluded her introduction by saying follow me and if anyone has any good drama let me know. Because I love the drama. That's when I truly realized this is going to be interesting and challenge accepted. She got all excited when I told her I'm a Chef. Then I told her to watch out because you know what that means. I told her if your being a tour guide to escape hospitality and dealing with a toxic chef this isn't your day as far as being a tour guide goes. She said oh no and I laughed and walked ahead of her and let her think about that. She wasn't sure what to think about that kind of drama.
On our first stop we popped into the place that I had just been. I was a little put off about that but rolled with it. The server was still being a douche lord to the other server. Sure enough they brought me bruscetta. The same thing that I just had. We had a nice glass of white wine peared with it and she gave the in depth analysis on it. She told us she was an artist and a sommelier while juggling as a tour guide. I thought that was cool. I quickly realized that I was sitting near an American couple and there two young boys. The lady was a trophy wife and the boys were pretty reserved. I think it's because they thought very highly of themselves. They're from North Carolina. They also dressed like they were going to a PGA tour. The guy was pretty dense and the lady thought her milkshakes bring all the boys to the yard. At this point I was ready to get on with the next and not sit to close to them. But seeing how it was a small group I knew that was going to be tricky.
At the next restaurant they brought out a little basket for each of us of some fried risotto. They paired it up with a red. I found myself sitting next to two couples from England. I enjoyed talking with them. The men had a good banter about them. They also started giving the North Carolina couple a hard time and telling the parents to let the boys have a glass of wine. The best part is that they meant it. The boys are on the cusp of being teenagers. They were drinking soda and one guy said wine is better than drinking that shit. The parents just nervously laughed and the boys smirked and sucked down there sodas. I kept it together and didn't laugh out loud but I certainly thought that shit was hilarious and you don't hear that everyday. At this point I'm getting a little buzzed and before I had a chance to say anything it was time to keep the tour moving. As we were moving I was thinking that little basket was kinda lame but the wine was well balanced.
We got to the next restaurant and the seating was a little tight. The tour guide was giving her wine speal and the people from England were chatting me up. She got pissed that I was getting more attention than her. Even though I wasn't seeking it. She wanted me to give the polish couple a run down on slow food. I told her I'm good and I whispered that's your job.
Before I knew it I got a pasta dish with wild boar. It was similar to the one I had at the vineyard. It was paired nicely with a red wine. Before I knew it I realized why the people from England were chatting me up. They wanted to tell me that Trump is an idiot. The North Clarolina couple overheard and were uncomfortable. I just smiled and told them that I don't mind the thought of 1776. Who doesn't like the concept of freedom. As far as I'm concerned the verdict on Trump hasn't been determined yet. They told me how much of idiot he is. I shifted the conversation to me telling them how JD Vance was in Rome. I told them my story and explained to them that he came from nothing. I said we have rednecks and hillbillies in the states. Kinda like how you have Gypsys. I told them he was the equivalent of a Gypsy. For him to go to Yale which is the equivalent to Oxford is pretty impressive considering the obstacles that he must have encountered with elitism. Then I brought it back to Trump. I said that's his vice president. Don't you guys still have kings and Queens? That's America 🤷♂️ At this point the tour guide came into the frame being all spunky and asked us about the wine. One of the guys asked her about her career. He had a very practical conservative outlook. Which was interesting seeing how his last conversation with me was. He asked her how she was going to make a living to art after she was saying how she is going to go back to school for art philosophy. She was feeling kinda devastated. I spoke up and said if shes gonna pull it off this is the place to do it. She liked that. Then I told her a sommelier makes over six figures in a lot of countries. She didn't really expect that and it made her think. On the way out the door I was definitely a little more buzzed.
On our way to the next location I pointed out to the tour guide the road signs that have stickers that say go home Yankee. I laughed it off. But the particular sign I pointed at had a sketch of someone being crucified. I then said and I'm the asshole around here and fell back in line and let her think about it 🤷♂️
When we arrived at the Gelato shop for the final stop she gave us a good run down on the guy. I mentioned if Sienna's was better and she almost lost her marbles and started talking about there torture chambers. Meanwhile there was a serial killer museum. I glanced at that when I was eating my chocolate and pistachio Gelato.
When all was said in done I gave the tour guide a nice tip and said goodbye to the English couples.
Across the street was a famous karaoke bar. I figured this is a great way to finish off my stay in Italy. So I dabbled in my version of stupid and sang like a stone by audioslave and hotel California by the eagles. The crowd definitely preferred like a stone.
So I did the two mile walk back to the hotel. I was feeling pretty good about how much I had spent on the trip. When I got to the hotel I started to get my stuff together and I had to get headed to the airport for my 6am flight. I enjoyed my walk and slowed down the pace. I couldn't help but think about the stretch of no sleep I had ahead of me. It was already a full day and a lot of walking put in. I definitely could have slept at any point in time.
When I got back to the hotel I stretched and did some meditation before packing to get my head right. Once I got packed I went and checked out. I had the front desk get me a taxi.
On the taxi ride I got to see a more residential area of Florence. The taxi driver dropped me off at a gas station close to the airport. I didn't realize that thr airport didn't open till 3am. So I grabbed some Cappuccino and relaxed for an hour. At 3am I walked over to the airport and got in line for my flight. No one was at the ticket area and that was interesting seeing how I still had to go through security and get checked in. They finally arrived and a lot of people were in a similar situation. There was definitely some grumbling going on.
I did end up getting to the gate pretty early. TSA was pretty smooth.
Amsterdam was a good flight with plenty of space to nove around. The Cappuccino made it so I couldn't get a wink. But I enjoyed the view. The small plane bounced us around. The stewardess were very good on this flight.
When we got to Amsterdam I reflected on my decision of having a 8 hour layover instead of 2. I'm glad I did that. I didn't need two days with no sleep instead of three.
When I went through customs it was pretty smooth. They didn't give me a hard time about the gifts I was bringing back. I was relieved that wasn't a process.
When I boarded the plan I got to my seat I quickly realized this was going to be a long flight. Six hours approximately. Leg room was an issue. My six foot five frame put me in a tough spot. A guy from Serbia was sitting next to me and wasn't to happy when the flight attendant didn't let him sit in an empty seat. I was certainly all for that. Meanwhile a guy was having a meltdown over his seat. He demanded an upgrade and was acting like a child. The flight attendant tried to stand her ground but caved in. I was getting that no sleep coffee tingle and started getting pissed when he got his way and turned over and looked back and gave a shit eating grin towards to back of the cabin. I definitely wanted to midget toss him at that moment. So I decided to cough and say douche bag. It's the best thing I could think of. At this point I was on almost a full day of no sleep. When we got in the air I made sure to put on a movie and chill. Throughout the flight I got up several times to stretch. Lesson learned. Pay more for legroom.
When we arrived to Boston I was certainly relieved. It was even better when I found my bags and had no issue with that. Even though finding them was a little dramatic. Someone took mine off the belt and I had that brief moment of here we go..
Now my mission was to get to my bus stop. Luckily I only had to wait twenty minutes. In the meantime I enjoyed Boston transportation staff be mean to European tourists. That was entertaining.
When on the bus I finally had a locked down arrival time to the bus station. The bus station is a half hour from where I live. I called around and I got my sous chef and her boyfriend to pick me up. By the time I locked that down I didn't have time to catch some sleep.
When we arrived I was hungry and a pretty tired would be an understatement. I took my ride out for dinner and went home to finally get some rest.
The next day when I got all unpacked and organized I went to the restaurant and had plenty of fun stories to tell. Once it all sinked in I realized I've got it really good. I've got my Executive Chef job and my business. I've got creative freedom. In Italy creativity isn't encrcouraged from what I've seen. It's to bad they've got amazing products to work with.
Northern Italy was definitely an amazing experience. I think if I go back I will stay with my friend Eddy and save a little money on lodging and have a place to be based out of. He's an hour north of Venice. Exploring outside of Italy would also be fun. In the distant future southern Italy is definitely on my list.
My experiences were definitely brief on this trip. I don't claim to be an expert. The people watching was fun. Dropping names of the places where I exactly was isn't really my style for a lot of reasons. My trip wasn't “perfecto” but I didn't expect that. But I definitely had a learning experience ✔️
